Private Schools Under Fire Amid Extra-Curricular Activity Concerns

The NSW Department of Education is conducting a review of private schools. The Education Minister Rob Stokes has received significant pressure to overhaul entry requirements to address concerns that wealthy families are gaming the system by forcing their children to be coached in sports such as polo and golf, as well as unfair access to catamarans and ski equipment.

“While recognising that private schools have a history and are popular, is it correct that kids from lower socio-economic families must be reminded that their parents can’t take them to Saturday sport because they need to work?” Minister Stokes said.

It is understood that under the new scheme, rich helicopter soccer mums must now allow their children to become offended at minimum twice a week without filing a complaint to their teacher.

In additional full fee paying private school parents who wish to  bribe donate over $50,000 to the school must pay the tuition fee of 3 children whose parents otherwise couldn’t afford the school.

We don’t want there to be a perception that the pathway into private school has to come through nepotism and gifts of large unassuming brown paper bags with a dollar sign.

Warren Gates

Private schools consistently outperform public schools in sports, both sports competitions and insurance claims on sports vehicles.

But there is a dark side, with a sense of entitlement comes irrational self-confidence and over-inflated egos. Even if students avoid these pitfalls, some private-school students feel trapped.

Elon Zuckerburg, a year 10 student summed it up the best, “I’ve been pressured to represent the state in rowing. My weekends are filled with under-age drinking or competing in regattas. Sometimes I wish I was just at home, by myself, solving calculus equations and understanding the product of water and pentyl ethanoate under acidic conditions.”